A conduit for love
We hang on to all sorts of things in our lives for many reasons. For instance, a relationship might make us feel safe, bring us comfort from all the worries of the world, but not bring us fulfilment. We might want to prove ourselves to others in the workplace, show everyone that we can handle the stress of the job just like our colleagues, so stick it out even though it’s clearly making us feel unhappy.
Who benefits from this kind of stubbornness, pushing against the current, day after day? I have been thinking about this a lot over this last week while I have been lying sick in bed. Mind you I did do some binge watching in-between. Stanley Tucci’s Searching for Italy was something I’ve wanted to watch for a while, so I indulged myself too. But, what I have been thinking about is that this year I have had a great deal of trouble letting go.
My best friend died around this time last year and I haven’t figured out how to live my life without her. She was so funny and brilliant and smart and loving, there is now a massive hole to fill and I haven’t got the energy to lift the shovel. When people talk about grieving, it’s kind of like “take your time” with an undercurrent of “hurry up, life goes on”. I suppose that us grievers will just have to take as much time as it takes and may never fully be out of the grieving circle. It might not hurt as much, but loss is loss no matter what.
I was contemplating on stopping my jewellery practice and getting a ‘real’ job because I just couldn’t create anymore. Well not to the capacity I have done in the past. But, then I got a call from a friends husband who wanted me to make his wife (my friend) a ring and then I realised something, this thing I do, making rings and pieces of jewellery for people is not necessarily all about the thing I make, but about the stories that I get to hear of how much a person is loved. I then get to imbue a little bit of that into the piece I make and that is so wonderful.
Jewellery can be a conduit for love, as it’s something that is worn so close to our skin and so often. It can mark a special or sad occasion. It can be worn to express our individuality or just to make us smile. Jewellery can give us confidence, it can become a talisman to protect or ward off evil spirits. Jewellery is so much more than just a status symbol. Maybe, for me it’s a way of letting go or perhaps making room for other things. I like the idea of making room rather than letting go, making room to be creative and take time to listen to other peoples stories.